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Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Why do we bother?

Well, it looks like we're pushing into the release cycle of the Xbox 360, and all I can ask is, why are we bothering? Our marketing department obviously figured out what the rest of the planet knows - there's no reason to buy an Xbox, nor will there be any reason to buy an Xbox 360. So, what do we get? Artificial Scarcity. Great job, guys.

You know what this says? It says "Hey, the 360 is crap, stick with Sony." After all, Sony just shipped Shadow of the Colossus, and already had their critically acclaimed God of War earlier this year? What does the Xbox have? That's right, not a goddamn thing.

The 360 will be more of the same mediocrity. Oh, but we'll have HALO! That'll make it ALL better. Or maybe Soul Calibur 3. I'll be sure to remember them when I'm playing the new Katamari Damacy game on my PlayStation 3, and enjoying actual innovative titles, instead of more inept PC rehashes and crappy, "Mature OMG!" games that the Xbox is reknowned for.

I can see the slogan now: Xbox 360: We still suck more than the PS2, God help us with the PS3 ships. Or maybe, Xbox 360: Exclusives? That's another name for "PC port", right?

Oh, and before I forget - the PS3 is going to provide 99% backwards compatibility out of the box. For the Xbox 360? You're going to need to buy an UPGRADE DISC should you ever want to play your old library. And if the title for that legacy game doesn't have "Halo" in it, well, do you *really* think you're going to matter that much? Remember, Halo's the only franchise worth talking about on the Xbox.

But, hey, if you really, truly want one, more power to you. I'm sure you'll have a load of fun playing DirectX shaders. They're what make games better, after all. None of that fancy-schmancy gameplay stuff, after all, it's the graphics that makes games worth playing.

On the bright side, once you've played all the original titles for the 360 in, oh, 12 minutes, you can sell the controller to the Australian Aborigines. They always need more boomerangs.

1 Comments:

At November 02, 2005 9:14 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

BLIMEY!

 

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